Sunday 20 May 2018

You're invited!

This is me being snarky snarkier than usual — really though, aren't editors paid to notice this sort of thing?

from The Ottawa Journal, May 8 1946, page 12

Well that's just swell.  Now everyone and their dog knows that a frail-looking 80-year-old by the name of Damase Laframboise who lives at 69 Sweetland Avenue has a LARGE SAFE in his house.  What more could someone have written on page 24? I can only speculate...

Has Large Safe
(continued from page 12)
Armed thugs who broke into the home of Damase Laframboise last night had no idea that they'd entered the home of a frail old man who keeps a LARGE SAFE in his house at 69 Sweetland avenue in Sandy Hill (see photo page 12). 

Like many older folk, Mr. Laframoise doesn't trust banks and keeps his valuables at home in a LARGE SAFE. His hoard includes family heirlooms in gold and sterling, an album of priceless, one-of-a-kind postage stamps, and, as he proudly pointed out, "many" bundles of high-denomination bank notes.

The would-be thieves likewise failed to realized that the oil painting of a ballerina above Mr. Laframoise's living-room couch is an original by the French artist Edgar Degas worth many thousands of dollars.

Mr. Laframboise's live-in niece, Eva Therien, keeps a black laquered chest (directly under her bedroom window). This is stuffed with unworn women's "foundation" garments into which are sewn Colombian emeralds, Australian fire-opals, Ceylonese rubies as well as diamonds from Africa's Kimberley mine. She claims to have gotten the idea for this from reading about the Romanov princesses in Reader's Digest.

Neither Mr. Laframboise nor Mrs. Therien owns a dog, though, as they laughingly pointed out, a blue budgie, "Robert", lives in their kitchen. They reside at 69 Sweetland (with a LARGE SAFE), in Sandy Hill between Osgoode and Somerset East, on the east side of the street. The address sits on an incline, so don't forget to use your parking brake!